Pillow Thoughts

I remember you saying
this is what it feels like
when you leave my place

Back then

I didn’t feel it
because I knew
I’d see you again

That’s changed

Now, when I’m alone

I wish you were next to me

Some mornings
I wake up to myself
just myself

and I hold my pillow
the way I’d hold you
because I can’t touch you

I lay there
thinking about my hands
on your thighs

the way I kissed your back
those little conversations
before you fell asleep in my arms

Can this moment not pass

Can I stay here
a little longer

just me
and this pillow

pretending it’s us

in bed
loving each other
under the rain